Category: diary-x.com posts

Insomnia

May 17, 2005 / / 0 Comments

Who needs sleep
Well, you’re never gonna get it
Who needs sleep
Tell me, what’s that for
Who needs sleep
Be happy with what you’re getting
There’s a guy been awake since the second world war
–Barenaked Ladies, Who Needs Sleep

It’s 3:09am, and I’m wide awake. It’s been a while since I’ve had an attack of insomnia this severe–to be honest, I can’t remember the last time. I’ve tried everything I can think of to try to fall asleep: meditation, masturbation, progressive relaxation, and two cups of warm milk with nutmeg. Nothing is working.

At this point, I’m wondering which is the lesser of two evils: staying awake for the rest of the night or going back to bed. Either way, I’m going to be a zombie all day tomorrow… or today, I suppose. Generally, it’s much less unpleasant to just stay awake than to sleep for only a few hours. At least when staying awake, my brain favors me with enough endorphins for a nice sleep-deprivation buzz. (Never had one? You should try it. I spent most of high school in a constant fog due to them.)

I can already hear morning birds singing. Dammit. That’s not helping.

I think I’m going to just stay awake all night and drink lots of coffee all day long, and nap with my head on the table during my breaks. This, of course, will be followed by an epic collapse as soon as I get home from work.

Yeah, I think that’s the plan. I’m going to do laundry, send out semi-coherent job applications, and consume absurd amounts of caffeine.

It’s Late and I’m Rambling

May 17, 2005 / / 0 Comments

Observation of the day: People look at you funny when you walk around barefoot for no discernible reason.

I like to meditate by lake Mendota after work once or twice a week. It’s incredibly relaxing, and I always feel much happier after doing it. Today, I stowed my zafu in my backpack (I thought I’d look strange carrying it around with me) and headed for the park.

Tenney park is almost always filled with people right around sunset. This time of year, there are people fishing, jogging, biking, swimming, and laying out on the grass. When I jog through it, I usually see a children’s soccer team or two practicing next to the basketball courts, as well as parents talking while watching their kids on the playground. It feels like a real communal area, and it’s one of the reasons why I really like Madison. Despite not knowing any of my neighbors, my neighborhood feels like a community.

Accordingly, I walk by a number of people on my walk to and from the tiny peninsula where I like to sit and meditate. When they notice that I’m not wearing shoes, they definitely give me a wider berth than they ordinarily would.

I really don’t see how this is a big deal. If I saw someone barefoot in the park, I’d probably smile to myself and feel a bit of a connection with a kindred spirit. I love being barefoot. If not for certain OSHA and health code laws, I’d probably be barefoot every day I wouldn’t lose my feet to frostbite.

…

:: thinks ::

Ok, I’ve run out of steam on that particular topic.

Something else I’ve been meaning to post about is an idea I heard about at Jeremy and Christy’s wedding: freecycling.

[Congratulations Jeremy and Christy! I’m very happy for you two. May the two of you have a long and happy life together. ]

Anyway, freecycling is advertising your old unwanted (but still useful) stuff on the Internet for others in your local area to pick up. You can find local groups at freecycle.org. Madison has a very active group. It seems like a great idea. Basically, it’s a great way to get rid of some of your excess clutter in a way that doesn’t add to the landfills and benefits someone else. I have boxes and boxes of old computer hardware sitting in my room that I need to get rid of before the next time I move. I think I may begin clearancing the stuff in the not too distant future.

And on a final note, I’d just like to say that one of my previous posts was complete and utter nonsense. My post about Beth was completely batshit insane. Beth will never, ever, want anything to do with me ever again; and for that matter, I wouldn’t want to deal with her either. On top of all this, I have it on fairly good authority that her ex literally wants me dead. So you can just scrap that whole post.

I really don’t know what the hell I was thinking.

Allergies

May 5, 2005 / / 0 Comments

I saw not too long ago that Madison is ranked twenty-third in the nation for springtime allergy suffering. At the time, I glanced over it and thought to myself, “Man, I’m glad I don’t have allergies. That would suck.”

Well, it turns out that I do have allergies, and it does suck.

I’ve had allergy symptoms once before. It was quite a few years ago, and they hadn’t bothered me since. Now, unfortunately, they’re back and worse than ever. Itchy eyes, sneezing, runny nose… the works.

I’m on some nighttime allergy medicine right now, but it doesn’t seem to be helping. My nose is still running, and my head still hurts. The only thing that has seemed to help at all has been holing up in my bedroom with my air purifier cranked up all the way.

Stupid pollen.