Category: bitching

November 30, 2009

November 30, 2009 / / 0 Comments

I am depressed. I have no idea what I’m doing in Seattle, or in general. When I made the plans to come here, I was half-mad with grief after Megan moved out. I’d been planning to restart our relationship once I got here, but things haven’t worked out that way.

For reasons I don’t really understand, Megan volunteered to fly out to Madison, then help me drive to Seattle. The night I went to pick her up, I was physically crushed by stress and weariness. I was so exhausted that the only joy I felt in waiting for her arrival came in the form of gratitude for any excuse to stop packing.

When she walked out of the terminal, bag in hand, she looked as haggard as I felt. Probably selfishly, I had expected that she’d have done her makeup, or her hair, or something to make herself look good. She was wearing the shapeless brown polo required for her massage clinic hours and no makeup. As she walked towards my car, not smiling, I felt only a vague worry that I was too dangerously exhausted to drive back to the empty apartment we used to share. Looking back now, it was in that moment that I realized that our romantic relationship was gone forever.

We made the drive together, which was uneventful and extremely expensive. I’ve been here for nearly a month now. I have a storage locker, a borrowed bedroom, no job, and very little else. I spent two hours on Monster today without finding a single job I was qualified for, or hadn’t already applied to. The rest of the day was spent obsessively searching for an SD card reader I’ve lost, sharing a joyless meal with my roommates/hosts where the only brief topic of conversation was the lunatic who murdered some cops yesterday, and lying on the floor staring at the ceiling fan blades.

At the moment, I’m listening to Elliott Smith’s Needle in the Hay. It’s part of my oh-so-pleasant depression mix. I’ve been working on perfecting it tonight.

August 26, 2009

August 26, 2009 / / 0 Comments

I finished the online weekly claims form for Unemployment, and it informed me that since I’d quit my job, I needed to call and talk to an actual human being. Sighing with annoyance, I did so.

“Unemployment,” A tired voice said. “Can I have your social security number, please?”

I rattled it off.

“I’m sorry, sir,” The voice said, now clearly annoyed. “There’s no record of a claim for you for this week.”

I looked more carefully at the form telling me to call, and noticed that it said to wait two or three hours before doing so. Apparently it takes a while for data from the online system to trickle into the phone operators’ system. I explained my error, and said I would call back in a few hours.

“Don’t bother,” said the voice. “It’s a Monday, and the system is really slow because of all the claims coming in. I wouldn’t try back until tomorrow if I were you.”

I did so. This time, the “unemployment specialist” had my info available to her. I explained my reasons for quitting my job–bounced and missing paychecks–and she dully informed me that someone would get back to me within twenty-one days.

“Ok, thank you.” I said, about to end the phone call. “…did you say twenty-one days?!”

“Yes, sir.” She responded, betraying only the barest trace of interest in the conversation. “Someone will call you, or you will receive a letter in the mail.”

Inwardly viciously cursing, I again thanked her and got off the line.

Twenty-one days, I thought. And that’s not even until I get paid. That’s when someone will begin investigating my claim.

That was two weeks ago, yesterday. My only response from unemployment thus far has been automated responses from the online claims system. I’ve continued to file for benefits in the interim, and each letter I receive in the mail informs me that my benefits are being held pending the results of the investigation.

Meanwhile, my savings are dwindling. I’m spending as little money as possible, but I still have bills to pay. My former employer owes me more than two thousand dollars, and shows absolutely no signs that she’ll be giving it to me without a lawsuit.

I’m to the point that I’m selling things I don’t need to make some extra cash. Megan, a friend, and I had a garage sale on Saturday, where I made about a hundred dollars. I sold a Wii game yesterday for a fiver at PrePlayed, and I sold a box of books to Half Price Books this morning for another fifteen. I’ve been searching through closets and boxes to find things of value I don’t mind parting with, but I’m starting to run low on them.

It Sucks Being “The Night Guy”

July 9, 2008 / / 2 Comments

I’m really sick of being “The Night Guy.” I hate to sound like Rodney Dangerfield, but I don’t get any respect. Until recently, I’d gotten used to the string of unintentional oversights by my coworkers–food brought in to the break room always gone by the time I get in, important meetings scheduled outside my work hours, little or no communication between shifts–mostly little things that imply that my coworkers never even consider the fact that anyone works different hours than they do. Lately, however, it’s just been getting insulting.

In March I asked to be switched to the day shift. This is a reasonable request, considering I’ve been here for more than two years. Despite my boss’s continuing reassurances that they’re working on hiring someone to take over my current hours, I’m still working the same shift. Since I requested the change, they hired a new tech. He works Monday through Friday, 9am until 6pm. If you were wondering, yes, that’s the shift I wanted. He does the exact same job I do, and they pay him more.

When I got into the office after my weekend, someone had swapped my desk chair for a creaking, screeching, back-torturing piece of junk. When I angrily asked my coworker what happened, he told me that the owner had taken my chair and given it to one of the tenants we rent office space to. Tenant had complained to Owner about the chair I’m now sitting in, so Owner gave him my chair without even leaving me a note.

Earlier that week, the woman in charge of scheduling company events came over to my desk to tell me that they’d scheduled a company outing, a minor-league baseball game, for a Thursday night. I work Thursdays. They’d knowingly scheduled a company outing for a night when I can’t go. This would be understandable if this were a large company–but we have a total of eleven employees. Literally everyone in the company, plus a guest, gets to go except me.

I really can’t think of a better way to say to an employee, “We don’t value you” than what they’ve done over the past month. Fuck this. I’m done.