So tonight, I get home from yet another group project meeting feeling a little down. My girlfriend’s sick, so she won’t be coming over, and tomorrow I’m going to have a ridiculous amount of work to do.

Then I remembered that my mom gave me a carton of egg nog. So I opened the carton and poured myself a small glass of the thick, light yellow, spicy-smelling liquid with small flecks of black and brown suspended in it.

With a bit of trepidation, I took a sip.

“Damn, that’s noggy.”

I sat down at my computer, idling wasting time, and sipping egg nog… until my stomach began to twist. It was right about then that I remembered five years ago when I decided to “get fucked up holiday-style.” I was mixing egg nog and spiced rum. It was terrible.

But it was the start of a very interesting night. I was drinking in a dorm, and after I ran out of egg nog (or rum, can’t recall very clearly), I went to the other side of campus and kept drinking with different people.

The rest of the night is pretty hazy… I only remember bits and pieces: vomiting black liquid into the toilet in a ladies restroom, making out with a girl that I had been intentionally avoiding (yes, after vomiting), having a crowd of people scream “GET A ROOM!” at us, and then waking up in her bed the next morning.

It was one of the few times that I’ve woken up and thought, “Where the hell am I?” To this day, I have no idea how I got into her loft.

What a mistake. Ugh. At least I didn’t have sex with her.

So now my body rejects egg nog. Since it’s only available once a year, I always have time to forget that in the interim.

Hey Christine, you want a mostly-full carton of egg nog?